The Handbook
The Handbook

We hear that James Bond, the nation’s favourite #MeToo disaster and Britain’s suavest cold-blooded killer, is trading in the philandering for philately. Poor Miss Moneypenny will still have to watch as beautiful ladies lick¬†James’s bottom, though, because he’s going to be on the front of Royal Mail’s latest stamps collection.

The stamps, coincidentally timed to launch alongside the profit behemoth that is the 25th Bond movie, will take a retrospective look at the history of the lucrative movie franchise through the medium of ten little stickers. Which is a shame, given how few of us send letters any more…

The collection is inspired by the iconic opening scenes of Bond movies, the thrilling first few minutes when the spy narrowly escapes the evil clutches of [insert whichever baddie name here] followed by the credits sequence, known for their psychedelic creativity and occasional nudity.

Roger Moore Bond’s submarine Lotus Esprit vies with Pierce Brosnan Bond’s post-Cold War sickle bashing opening credits, while Sean Connery Bond is seen handling his missile-laden¬†autogyro in scenes that will make any Bond fan reminisce for Bonds past and gooey about the upcoming Bond 25.

The new film is slated for release in April, and will mark Daniel Craig’s final outing as the world famous spy man. The script has been given the once-over by Fleabag star Phoebe Waller-Bridge and we’ve already sampled the theme tune courtesy of Billie Eilish. Now there’s just time to dash off a postcard, stamped with a special Bond stamp and maybe a a quick romp and some philately with Bond himself before No Time To Die is finally released.

Pre-order the stamps, which are released on Tuesday 17th March, by visiting the Royal Mail website…