It’s 2am, you’re mid-way through an arachnid-riddled nightmare, when suddenly a slight brush across the cheek makes your sleep encrusted eyes crack open. Your head turns slightly to one side, and there it is. A big black, hairy house spider, who’s decided he’s cotchin’ in your crib tonight… It’s at this point you realise incy-wincy spider from the children’s tales isn’t so incy-wincy after all.

And this week we are mid way through annual ‘spider season’, so sleep at your own peril. So-called spider season stretches crawls from around the first week of September to early October and it’s when house spiders are more prevalent than any other time. Professor Adam Hart, a (brave) researcher of the spider cycle notes that “about 80% of the spiders people see are males”, and they’ve got their many eyes peeled for a female counterpart, hence adorning our homes with their presence to have a good scout this time of year. Often us Brits freak out at the sight of an eight-legged intruder, with a whole host of starting to notice their arrivals in our homes as winter approaches.

So, we thought we’d share our eight top ways to get rid of spiders on the web (get it? the web?). Thank us later!

Peppermint Oil

Peppermint oil

Random? Very. However, peppermint oil is actually a perfect way to discourage our eight-legged enemies. Get your hands on a squirty bottle and pop some drops of peppermint oil in. Then spray away – not at the spider, but around your house, particularly at points of entry. It’s a real winner, and not only will your house smell like minty fresh breath, but, hopefully, you’ll be spider free!

Vinegar

For more than fish and chips

Eeek! Quite prehistoric, and not as nice a smell as peppermint oil, but vinegar can also be used in a spray form to rid you of the ever-so-creepy crawlies. Simply fill a bottle up with vinegar oil, half water too and spray all the crevices you can find. I’d run a mile entering a house filled with vinegar, so it should work wonders on our little friends (if they have any sense that is). Ever seen a fish and chip shop with a spider problem? Thought not.

Plant a Eucalyptus Tree

Unleash your inner koala bear

OK, it looks like we have to take some strange steps to rid ourselves of crawlies, and whilst you might not have a eucalyptus tree to hand, it turns out its worth getting one to help keep the spiders out. The strong smell of the tree is said to repel spiders, so if you’ve got a garden to hand, get your green fingers out.

Lights Off

Let there not be light

Spiders prey crawl towards the light faster than we jump out of bed when we realise we’ve got company. So whilst the spiders won’t be attracted to it, it’s best to turn off all lights outside and close the blinds if you’ve got them on indoors… don’t worry, we’re not saying you should revert back to the dark ages, just be vigilant, to avoid any insects getting any ideas.

Electonic Spider Repeller

Tech away the spiders

We’re millennials. We grew up on Toby McGuire as actual Spiderman, and he wasn’t too scary. We also grew up with technology. So away with these herbal methods, let’s get sciencey. A spider repeller plugs neatly into the wall and does all the work for you. Like one of those Glade room fresheners that makes your flat smell like an old lady’s house. Except it electronically shoos away spiders. We’re also millennial in that we have no idea how it actually works, we just trust the tech, but assume it’s something to do with sound waves. Maybe?

Website: Buy on Amazon...

Spider grabber

Grabby McGrabface

You’re cornered by a spider. Waddy’ do? Well you certainly don’t stoop down and pick him up, that’d be unthinkable. Unless, that is, you’ve got a spider catcher. Sort of litter picker meets washing up brush, these devices don’t damage the spider’s delicate legs, but allow you to grab him (or her, obviously, we’re all about the gender equality, though remember the 80% thing from earlier) and place him outside without any fuss. Simples!

Website: Purchase one here...

By the power of vacuums

This sucks

If you liked the last one, then you’ll love this: get rid of the little critters using the power of suction. Point the device at your arachnid foe and ‘fwuup’, up it goes into your vacuum tube to be disposed of at leisure.

Website: Buy one here...

Tried and tested: mug and paper

The old ones are always the best, right? No need to douse with peppermint, forget electronic scarers and fancy scoopers and go old school. Mug and paper. Can’t be beaten.