Better Sex And Where To Eat It
Before you drop the needle on the Ginuwine record, put the champagne on the rocks and spread the rose petals over the duvet, you’re going to need to grab a shucking knife and step over to the stove… because foreplay starts in the kitchen. Food as a route to sexual lust and pleasure is a well oiled trope, and appears to have the backing of medicine, with aphrodisiacs acting as hormonal stimulants, catalysts for the giddy parts of your body. Oysters, for example, are thought to be a natural sexual stimulant because of their high zinc levels, correlated to the production of testosterone and increase in energy. And what woman doesn’t want to trigger their testosterone production (hello moustache)?
So here are a list of our favourite foodie sexual stimulants, and where in London you can go to eat them. See you in the bedroom!
Oysters
As perhaps the most obvious aphrodisiac, the oyster is, to put it politely, sex in a shell! It’s the naughty food option that’ll see Casanova fighting himself out of your body. But why oh why do they make us so frisky? Well, oysters are filled with zinc which is indeed necessary for a healthy male sperm count. But this aside, in 2005 unusual amino acids were found in oysters, thought to increase testosterone production. So, there’s the slightly less romantic back story, but where are the best places to eat them?
Made up of the oyster bar downstairs and the grill upstairs, Bentley’s is arguably one of London’s most loved seafood restaurants, having sold fish and chips to the London hordes for over a century. For the past decade, it’s been under the eye of Richard Corrigan who says of Native oysters: “Natives are an acquired taste, you either love them or loathe them.” Long story short though, if you loathe them then move along, you are certainly no Romeo.
When a venue has oyster in the name we’re kinda expecting big things. Luckily Hix Oyster & Chop House delivers the goods! Hix are known to try their oysters every single week – wow, that must be one raunchy kitchen – and the menu tries to boast at least four different types of oysters. Well, we’re sold!
J Sheekey Atlantic Bar is a hidden jewel, nestling between the bright lights of Leicester Square and chic Covent Garden, on the doorstep of jostling Chinatown and action-fuelled Soho. Open daily from midday until late, food is seasonal, delicious and affordable. Appealing to seafood enthusiasts, but neglecting no-one, the menu offers small sharing plates of fish, shellfish, salads and seasonal game, not to mention with a very theatrical Plateau de Fruits de Mer. But this is all irrelevant – pass us the oysters!
The delicious offering at Mercer Rooftop Terrace shows oysters from Ireland, Cornwall and Cumbria on the menu which are laden with vibrant edible flowers and a helping of tarragon vinegar. What’s more, the views span the city – twinkly lights, movie moments and all that, how darn romantic!
Watermelon
Watermelon… Mmm, it’s the innocent fruit that just a whole more hot, hot, hot! Watermelon is in fact a huge aphrodisiac, following closely behind oysters. It’s a rich source of the non-essential amino acid citrulline and citrulline relaxes and dilates blood vessels much like Viagra and other drugs meant to treat erectile dysfunction. Right then, we think we can guess what’s coming next…
Eclipse cocktail bar is famed for its watermelon martini a drink which has remained their best seller over the years… we wonder why! The coveted cocktail features Kettle One vodka and kaffir lime leaves.
Chocolate
Eating chocolate is naughty on the calorie count as it is, but things are about to get a whole lot steamier! Chocolate, our dear pal, our trusty go-to, our sweetest sweet tooth tempter, actually contains phenylethylamine — a stimulant that elicits excitement and a sense of well-being. What’s more, dark chocolate is known to be the naughtiest of the lot boasting at least 75 percent cacao to get you all hot and flustered. Ooo, la la!
On the subject of chocolate and sex, London got its first chocolate cocktail bar last month and we pitched our tents and sleeping bags outside like it was an iPhone launch so that we could be first through the door. The concept, from Holly Brooks and Rachel Wisson has already taken Brighton by storm, before hitting London with every cocktail being chocolate based.
Alternatively, you can check out all of our favourite spots in London to get your chocolate fix.
Hot Chilies
It’s no myth! When we say chili’s making things hot, hot, hot we ain’t lying! Hot chilies are known to stimulate nerve endings on the tongue which releases epinephrine (adrenaline) increasing your heart and well, making you horny to put it in the most blunt of terms. If you’re brave enough to eat a whole one then chances are your sex drive will be through the roof! Why not put it to the test…
Red Dog Saloon is the place to go if you want to burn your mouth to smitherines. Actually, the chili is amazing here but boy is it hot. A food challenge in itself, we’re not sure even Man Vs Food could combat the Naga Viper Hot Wings.
Hutong is a sumptuous Chinese restaurant located on Level 33 of The Shard, offering panoramic views across London, private dining rooms, chic decor and seriously hot chili! The Ma La beef tenderloin is served with bell pepper chillies, at which point you should ask yourself is better sex really worth a mouth scorching?
Tonkotsu will provide you with a ramen that’ll literally blow your head off! And, if you’re still not put off by this, then try the new Extra Hot version of their signature “Eat the Bits” chilli oil and let us know what you think… if you still have a tongue to talk with!
Avocado
Yes, avo is an aphro! Maybe that’s why millenials can’t get enough of it. Fun fact which, may or may not, put you off: The Aztec word for avocado is “ahuacatl,” which means “testicle.” This naughtiness aside, avocado’s contain high levels of folic acid, vitamin B9 and vitamin B6 so, all in all, testosterone is increased and the rest is history…
Check out some of our favourite staple brunch spots which, we’re sure, play host to all the avocado you need! For new brunch spots? It’s here
And then of course there’s the restaurant completely dedicated to avocado…
For more bizarre dining options find out whacky guide here
