Sleep Divorce Is Trending Online – Here’s What It Means
Sleeping next to a snorer is one of the best ways to ensure you wake up on the wrong side of the bed. We’ve all been there, and it’s not pretty. Did you know, though, that research connects sleep quality with the longevity of relationships? Here, we take a closer look at the rising trend of ‘sleep divorce’ and explore what valuable insights it might offer, if any.
First, let’s set the scene: it seems sleep quality isn’t as good as it could be across the UK, especially for those in relationships. According to the 2024 Dreams UK Sleep Survey of 15,000 adults, a third of Brits in the UK admit to not being “sleep compatible” with their partner, and 76% say they sleep better alone. The same report revealed that a fifth of participants (of which there were 15,000) frequently sleep in separate rooms.
Now, there isn’t a single cause underlying this percentage of sleep incompatibility, with everything from duvet hogging, fidgeting and, of course, snoring among some of the most popular reasons. So it’s unsurprising that people are starting to look for solutions.
A third of Brits in UK admit to not being ‘sleep compatible’ with their partner.
What is a sleep divorce?
A sleep divorce refers to sleeping in another bed or room from your partner to improve sleep quality. It’s not a new idea, but it’s certainly having a moment online right now with TikToks of people sharing their first-hand personal and professional experiences racking up millions of views. Contrary to the stigma associated with sleeping separately as a sign of relationship struggles, others argue that this setup demonstrates the prioritisation of mutual wellbeing.
Why are couples considering it?
The most straightforward answer is that couples are hoping to improve the quality and/or amount of sleep they’re getting, but there’s more to it. Prioritising your sleep can be a game-changer for your health and relationship.
“Insufficient sleep has a significant impact on both your mental and physical wellbeing,” explains Senior Sleep Expert, Founder, and CEO of MattressNextDay, Martin Seeley. “Lack of sleep leads to higher levels of irritability, anger, frustration, and chronic sleep deprivation can even be linked to depression and anxiety.”
“Studies have shown that couples who sleep poorly have more marital conflict than those who sleep well,” adds Seeley. “A sleep divorce can help reduce these conflicts and lead to a happy and more peaceful relationship.”
Studies have shown that couples who sleep poorly have more marital conflict than those who sleep well.
Senior Sleep Expert, Martin Seeley
How to broach the topic with your partner
Of course, a sleep divorce isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution – every couple is different. If, however, it’s something you’re interested in trying, there are a couple of tips on how to raise it with your partner in a sensitive way:
As with many difficult conversations, timing is everything. “Sit them down and calmly explain why you think it could be beneficial,” advises Seeley. “Approach it gently, reassuring them that this isn’t a red flag signalling the end of the relationship.”
Second, emphasise the benefits for both of you. “From allowing you to have different sleep schedules, to being able to have the room at a cooler temperature if one of you prefers it warmer.”
Want more sleep content? Check out the ‘sleepmaxxing’ trend.
